I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
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