wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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