Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize