You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
