i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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