Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
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