R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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