Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Randomize
