We're facebook friends in real life
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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