is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize