We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
