He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
