you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
