How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
