What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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