You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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