Texts From Last Night

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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.

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  (802): Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye. http://tfl.nu/qfl2
  Replies (1) Good night (1089) Bad night (661)
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  (518): View more from New York

  my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...

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  (518): my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her... http://tfl.nu/xju0
  Replies (79) Good night (2371) Bad night (28836)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.

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  (651): whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it. http://tfl.nu/g1hs
  Replies (5) Good night (5650) Bad night (726)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.

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  (617): it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina. http://tfl.nu/7xv1
  Replies (14) Good night (1374) Bad night (4462)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.

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  (917): I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee. http://tfl.nu/dm1b
  Replies (44) Good night (2019) Bad night (7044)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving

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  (972): Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving http://tfl.nu/e1pp
  Replies (13) Good night (4858) Bad night (1222)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.

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  (402): Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER. http://tfl.nu/3m46
  Replies (23) Good night (2262) Bad night (3808)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.

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  (203): I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest. http://tfl.nu/16wx
  Replies (2) Good night (948) Bad night (1443)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".

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  (+44): Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis". http://tfl.nu/tct7
  Replies (7) Good night (1707) Bad night (580)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.

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  (832): He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass. http://tfl.nu/my94
  Replies (14) Good night (678) Bad night (1153)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?

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  (303): I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters? http://tfl.nu/gcgg
  Replies (10) Good night (633) Bad night (1225)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more

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  (412): its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more http://tfl.nu/r5j0
  Replies (3) Good night (1714) Bad night (639)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.

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  (940): P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message. http://tfl.nu/r5mr
  Replies (4) Good night (765) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream

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  (714): Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream http://tfl.nu/g5ns
  Replies (16) Good night (585) Bad night (912)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.

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  (832): 30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee. http://tfl.nu/6d16
  Replies (2) Good night (140) Bad night (348)

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