your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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