I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
