This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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