You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
