my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
