Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
