Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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