we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
