I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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