look no pants
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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