I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
We need a shit load of segways right now
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
