My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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