I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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