So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
