he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
