your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
