he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize