I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
