so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
