Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week