It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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