i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I don't deserve a penis
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.