so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
