I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
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