I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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