are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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