that's an acceptable place to lick
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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