Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
