? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
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