Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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