idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
