I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
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say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
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Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid