im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Two words: nipple clamps
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