After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
